(What you’re about to read is a dream your fearless Nantan had the other night)

Dear Diary,

It’s the 233 day of our Lord on this hot August 21st, 2021 and one thing I know is true…the men of F3BatonRouge hate me. I’m staying positive this hate will subside once all of them have been released from the hospital but for now, it’s raw putrid loathing they have for me. So how did this all begin? Well, I guess it all started when I arrived at the AO and gave the disclaimer….”I hope all you boys will make it out alive after this hour.” There was laughter from the men but I wasn’t laughing. I guess something inside of me must have snapped.

I announced it’s the 21st day of the month and lets start the warm-a-roma with 21 warm up exercises. Yes, we counted to 21 but literally, 21…warm-up…exercises.

SSH, Butt Kicks, Weed Pickers, Al Gore’s, Abe Vigoda’s, AC-Forward, AC-Backward, AC-Overhead, AC-In Front, Bobby Hurley’s, Finkle Swings, we were half-way through the warm-ups and the boys were breathing heavy. I gave them a look of haughty derision shaking my head but none were making eye contact with me. I wanted them to suffer so I told them we’re going to sing a song to finish the warm-up routine. There were shouts of joy and jubilant high fives with each other but none gave me a high five. I suddenly felt back in grade school recess being picked last for kickball behind the Thompson Twins in wheelchairs and foreign exchange student Long Duk Dong. I told the men, lets sing and do all the physical motions to Baby Shark. Suddenly it was deathly quiet and I’m positive I heard a wolf howling in the distance. We sang all the lyrics and performed the physical motions…….with our legs, Baby Shark, Mommy Shark, Daddy Shark, Grandma Shark, Grandpa Shark, Let’s Go Hunt, Swim Away, Shark Attack, It’s Too Late, Goin’ Home To Jesus. At the end of the song the men looked really embarrassed. I announced it was time to run 21 laps around the inner track. Once again there was silence within the group and someone ripped a nervous fart.

DA THANG

I told the men this was the 233 day of 2021……lets do 233 of something painful. Everything will total 233.

Stage 1 – Leg Burn!!!

• 50 Step Ups
• 50 Pole Squats
• 50 Freedies
• 50 Flutter Kicks
• 33 Monkey Hump-hers 😉

Stage 2 – Arm Burn!!!

• 50 Merkins
• 50 Freak Nasties
• 50 Incline Merkins
• 50 Push Aways
• 33 Wide Arm Merkins

Stage 3 – WTF3RUD0N2Us (What The F3 R U Do N 2 Us)

• 50 Bridges
• 50 Supine Toe Tap
• 50 Mountain Climbers
• 50 Merica Hammers
• 33 Dead Cockroach

Time Well Spent With Mary

• 21 Jane Fonda’s Right Side
• 21 Jane Fonda’s Left Side
• 21 Jane Fonda Pumps Left Side
• 21 Jane Fonda Pumps Right Side
• 21 Heels to Heaven

COT

Call the fleet of ambulances…..